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life on the fast lane.

speed through my veins

adrendaline pumping

race me to rapture.

Cruel intentions

I flee from reality..

but tonight,it all came rushing back.

cornered and choked.

the beans spill.

Ignorance is bliss

he said "you shine all the time."

you make me feel significant :)

i'mnosuperwoman

suffocating..

as the words claw their way up.

situations never change..

they remain and haunt.

helpless to my issues,

maybe it's time to move on.

will you ease my pain , let me breathe again.

I'm tired ,sick of holding back,

cause with all these restrains

I'm losing myself.

it may not be intended but

don't take my silence forgranted.

its times like this..

I miss you, myseptemberromance

Bleed me numb

There comes a point where you're emotionally and physically frozen .

when everything seems like a routine,in which nothing excites you.

with minimal emotions stirring within,you live life hollow .

religiously,praying to be taken.

away from this vicious cycle,

away from the aches.

give me my piece of pain,

a tinge of regret,

a segment of laughter,

a drop of euphoria..

give me heaven.

sometimes you can't make it,so all you do is to fake it

sometimes you can't make it on your own.don't leave me here alone.

I can't be fcuking bothered anymore,

screw over and just fcuk off.

ashes to dust

i fascinate myself too well with my sudden behavior shifts.
i wish i knew why this opted change...
but oddly i appreciate that negligent frenzy,"quote" unquote"James; my bitch fits.
destinationless fast walks lift my mood.
you walk,walk,walk ..till you're left breathless

apace with your predicament, ultimately they evaporate alongside the carbon dioxide you emanate.

tonight made a significant difference.

adapting to the change of enviroment...

it takes awhile,

but she'll get there.

old faces and yet another discomaniac night.

sadly my 'happyhigh' lasted for a mere hour ;(

nemesis alert,(spotting a beyond grave hairdo.*smirks*)

and overspicymaggiegoreng later , i endured a chilly bus trip home.

the past is real,the future speaks no boundaries.

fiddle diddle, fiddler on the roof

eager to reverse my already veryscrewedup bodyclock,

i shall keep alert for the next...20 hours.

plus given the fact that i'll probably be awoken by countless calls through out the day,

i'm gonna continue with my detox process.

.plenty of water

.healthy activities

.poping vitamins

After two whole days of downpour..

i'm gonna take full advantage of this rare morning sun.

grap a towel, my trusty taning lotion and i'm heading down for a much needed tan

while at it ;i'll work on my wishlist too*smiles*

;) she wears a tiny weenie insy bitsy yellow polka dot bikini....

stars aligned

Three's a crowd.

odd numbers never work out..

or do they add up to coincide with circumstances?

she tries to shake of those jaded sentiments.

cause maybe, just maybe..its assumed.

walk away ?or stay on for the finale?

a prick in the chest..

that desire to question yet fickle in the mind.

15 months.

promise me tomorrow starts with you.

.my all time favourites.

my disease and cure

my sorrow and felicity

my twin shit heads and foursome panzys :))

jingle bells

With christmas looming around the corner..

its that favourite time of year again..

chilly weather ,dazzling lights, carols, red,white and green wrappers

and the indefinate seasonal swipping..i mean shopping.wee!!^o^

holely pockets and burning plastic.

tis the season to be jolly.

the journey begins..

wishlist in the making. watch for this space ;)

nashing teeth

i'm amazed at the way i really need you.

As the songs repeat,
they string you back to a memory,
a particular phrase in your life .
You pause fo that split second ,
take a moment of silence
and embrace that familarity,that aura of surealism.
amazing how these senses emit such strong vibes.
sparking a certain longing for the past.
No matter how you try to conceal ,the fire never estinguishes.

enthusiastic yet weary.

as usual she's stuck in reverse.

For all our crazy candid moments, latenight urges, loony behavior and exchanged insults. i love you.

peer pressure

Thanks to you , hourly mouisturising is a must morning,noon and night.

i love you silly :)

Movie censor'shit'

Maybe its me,

but for all my weightless advice, I enjoy tormenting myself by lounging right smack infront of the TV,drowning myself in endless romantic comedies/movies,

accompanied with boxes of tissue and tubs of ice cream.typical.

in between,I source out all their faults in the relationship.

and smirk to myself on how it would never even work out.

ironic?

cause when it comes to me, with the countless loopholes and cracks.

I'm oblivious.

however despite my neurotic mindset, my still heart leaps everytime theres a happy ending;

where they kiss in the rain and exchange' i love yous'.god, i'm like so mellow drama.

you know what?

for all the heartbreak and trashed expectations; i blame these so called "light hearted"movies.

why, you may ask.

i present to you, my case.

love's never as it is portrayed in the movies.

love at first sight?

seriously,who the hell in this age or time would believe that.

probably,just the untainted mindsets of the pre teens.

and soon in time they'll grow to realise, its just a myth.

ta da..Heartbreak no.1

alright then there is the whole guy romances girl with dinners and such,they fall in love ,throw in a lil steamy love making..then happily ever after episode.

purlease..there's alot more to it then extravagant spending.

so she comes to understand that it ain't always a bed of roses.

heartbreak,no.2.

Of cos there's always the perfect scenarios and fairytale-like endings.

relationships never or at least rarely end sweet.

you don't always end up with your first love.And READ this,

love is never perfect.

heartbreak no.3

don't you see, all these illusions of love we try or at least fantasize bout.

somehow in hope that ours would turn out exactly the way it did in "emma & alex' or

"50 first dates"

get this straight ,this is reality not fantasy.

frankly speaking ,i'm always impartial,and never certain.. .

maybe i analyze wrong...so?

sue me.

my blog ,my opinion.

i guess a girl's entitle to her senseless self once in a while.

so for all my bittersweet emotions and current unfulfilled desires,

lets drink to self contradiction.cheers

.almost there.

peachy beachy

sunshiny smiles. golden tanlines. strawberry magaritas. infectious laughter.

 

Getting away with murder

I hold on no further..
words unreversable.
you're right, it would never have lasted.
what we have will start with a memory...
i'm glad.
cos i know i tried.
upteen times mentioned,
but it has to be the last.

up and coming festive moods.
beautiful decos deck the streets, happy couples cuddle to this "white" chrismas.
dashed dreams , lonely missletoe nights.
i'm resentful.
do i want to shatter the glass ball..this self made illusion.
call me silly, mock me all u fancy,
but when it comes to this ...
i face my demons,straight on.

you mentioned, i've got you..do i ?
in the late of night,will you even be there...
no ones ever gonna,this i figured.

so unless you're certain , let me be..

i don't want another heartbreak

another stab through the heart,

another piercing.

Playful instigations

i need that ultimate adrendeline rushing,

dragon sighting..piece of heaven,

NOW.

take me to a place where,there's no turning back.

self instigated but i detect a strong sense of remorse and regret.

is this worth ?

shall we start anew?

Shakespeare in love

entwine with the unresolved
sudden movements make me jitter
beneath the calm front, flows raging waters.
impulsive actions foreseen.

and it sets in..
direction taken a screeching turn.
adopted drama taking it's toll,I'm thankful.
. save the best for last.

on a lighter note:
a pierced tongue and slurring conversations
later,its the beach and prettygoldentan,
my lovelies filled with triggerhappy moments.

we'll say nothing at all

as love in its majestic beauty lingers amidst the air,

floating in an array of brilliant translucent.

you can only admire from afar.

fondle,caress it

but never grasp it.

you'll know its over when its over.

i'll see you when i do ,

till then ,we'll be happy ,

for we'll still embrace those lucious memories.

solemn salem

it's a constant battle ,with everything thats within.

pride, emotions, beliefs.

why do words come out wrong.

you eventually speak up..

yet you're instantly convicted to the death sentence.

persecuted and bruised.

pierced and desolated.

who do you look to?

what would you rely on?

Love?

it's probably a mere illusion of something so fragile and even far fetched.

friends?

do they really..

family?

will they ever..

and so it all boils down to self reliance ,

apace with mindfcuk illusions and addictive highs.

feed her the red pill..yet she craves the blue pill.